Santa’s got lists covered up at the North Pole, but here in Orange County it’s naughty and nice yelpers alike who know what it takes to make a list sizzle. This week we pay tribute to just a few of the lists that are sure to keep our bookmarks tab full.

With 34 cities in Orange County, lists are a major resource for finding the hidden gems in each one. South County’s well taken care of, with Robert C yelping about his ‘hood in Aliso Viejo and Austin C mapping out the best Cougar Hunting Grounds… and we’re pretty sure he’s not talking about mountain lions. Between Judi S exploring all the spots in Brea and Dave G all up in Yorba Linda, you’ll have no trouble finding the best that the Northern reaches of OC have to offer. In Irvine, Sonja L is on an exciting, one-woman mission to discredit the “boring” reputation of the city, while Ryan P prefers to keep it quaint as he lists his favorites eateries in Old Towne Orange.

On the nicer side, Caroline C keeps it prim and proper at all of her most-loved places for afternoon tea. Pinkies out! Rhea S knows how to show off those well-manicured pinkies when she carefully types out the list of spots she counts on to keep up her diva status. Meanwhile, blushing bride Jessica K puts her etiquette classes to good use as she lets us in on some of her secrets to Nuptial Bliss. Health-conscious eaters Safa S and David P also make the nice list as they spill the beans on the best vegetarian and healthy restaurants in OC.

Devlish Yuki M tempts us to join the naughty side by over-indulging on her “Did You Say Buffet?” list. Another fan of excess, Vanessa N swears, “If there’s refined sugar in it, I’m there” on her homage to the sweet tooth. The happiest hour of the day for David L, on the other hand, involves sugar of the alcohol variety… and discounted, at that! And Chris E rounds out the misbehavior by divulging his fave watering holes on “Drink, Drank, Drunk,” but is nice enough to warn that “your liver must be in good working condition!” Well, there’s only one way to find out…

This week we dip into the dark and dirty drinking den better known as the dive bar. To the dive-hunting purists among us, we apologize for illuminating watering holes that by their nature strive to remain seductively unknown. For those new to the genre, tread lightly – take heed that a true dive should leave you with a tinge of concern for your personal safety.

For a city with one of the poshest malls in the country, Costa Mesa sure knows its dive bars. One of Chase A’s standards is The Little Knight, and he confirms their seedy status by divulging that “the bathroom looks like a cast that was signed by perverts.” It’s the free PBR from 10-11pm on Wednesdays that leads Natali H to Avalon Bar, where she likes to cozy up on the smoking patio that’s “cramped, but when you bump into someone they’re almost always attractive so it’s okay.” Depends on who’s doing the bumpin’, Natali. Meanwhile, Lee U prefers The Helm, a bar that’s “as dive as they come.” He also lets us in on his late-night secret: “It’s only a half-block walk to Dippity Donuts – your tummy will thank you!”

While some dives are only filled with locals, Ryan K digs The Sandpiper Lounge, comparing a night there to “a box of chocolates – you never know what’s inside.” Bar-gazer David H’s litmus test for a dive bar is the clientele, which is why he picks Tony’s Place – “it opens at 6am and grizzly old men take up a barstool with the morning paper and their morning cocktail.” Want good lighting? Then don’t go to Johnny’s Saloon in HB. Alyssa T considers it “probably the darkest bar you will ever enter,” and with plenty of punk on the jukebox and dollar drink specials, who needs to see!

Joanne D gets her down ‘n’ dirty bar fix at Marty’s in Orange, pointing out that “it’s like Cheers, but instead nobody gives a #&!$ about your name!” If you’re ever in a situation where you can’t find a dive, trust your friendly neighborhood bowling alley bar like Brad W. He strikes out at Linbrook Bowl’s bar, munching on the free popcorn and hanging with the regulars that are “straight out of a great yet-to-be written screenplay about lounge lizards and barflies.” (Will someone rent The Big Lebowski for Brad, please?). Perhaps Liz O sums up the dive bar experience best then when describing The Fling in Santa Ana: “Cheap booze, quaint folk, old-ass everything and mothball/Marlboro/Bourbon aromatherapy.” Ah, Charles Bukowski would certainly be proud.